Uber Horny! It can be a pain in the ass going out there to meet horny sluts. So many bitches these days have dumb fucking expectations for a “relationship” or “something stable.” Man, screw that. I just want to take a dime piece back to my pad and fuck her pussy raw until she has to stumble out in the middle of the night because, you cucks know, I’m not letting her spend the night. It can be tough to find sluts out in the wild who are down with that. Usually, the only chicks interested are way too fucking drunk or blasted out of their minds, and I’m not trying to catch a court case.
So, I go online where broads are more willing to spread their legs for strangers on the internet. And that’s where I came across Uberhorny.com. It’s a meet-up site that has been around for right around a decade. Notice that I didn’t say a dating site. There’s no d-word here. This site is all about meeting up and getting laid. None of that annoying feeling shit getting in the way. So if you’re a dude looking to get some pussy then this is the place. Or, hell, maybe you’re a kinky bitch looking to get dicked down. Either way, this site brings in nearly 1 million visitors every single month, so they have to be doing something right.
Making an Account is Easy and Doesn’t Require a Lengthy Questionnaire
To get to the main page, you’ll need to sign yourself up for a free account. It’s not too difficult, though, because this site doesn’t ask you a million goddamn questions like some smart chick on a first date. You just put down what sort of action you’re looking for and who you are. Oh, and you can upload a couple of pictures so that people have an idea of what to expect. You can make an account as a man, woman, or a couple.
Once you’ve got all of that sorted, you’ll be greeted with a pretty busy main page. Here you can see previews for who is online now and even play a quick swipe game to let chicks know that you’re interested in them. You’ll also see live streams, local girls, popular photos, popular videos, and a scrolling bar up top that shows the latest pictures added to the site. As I said, a lot is going on here, so take your time. You’ll also see an activity center in the top-left for the newest updates to the site across all sections.
Affordable Trial Options and Year-Long Subscription Plans
In that same section, you’ll see a message box and friend list. But to do much of anything on this site, you’ll have to pay up for a premium membership. Without one, you can’t view photos, videos, live streams, or store messages very long at all. Luckily for you cheap cucks, it’s not very expensive. You’re only paying an arm and a leg if you do a 1-month plan for 30+ bucks. Otherwise, you can get a cheap monthly plan of $6.67 a month if you payout for a whole year. They also offer cheap 2-day and 7-day trials if you want to dip your toes into the action first.
They back all of their plans with a 3-month hook-up guarantee. If you don’t meet up with a kinky bitch within three months, then they’ll give you your money back, no questions asked. It doesn’t matter what you look like or how small your cock is. This guarantee applies to every single one of you bastards. Of course, all payments are discrete and won’t show up on your card as some obvious site.
Easy-to-Use Site Full of Real, Local Babes Looking to Get Laid
Once you’re signed up and have paid for an account, you can start using this site in earnest. Send hot babes messages, swipe on girls for matches, fap to photo galleries, and so much more. This site is fucking full of amateur content of whores getting off on camera. You can find a lengthy list of site-exclusive camgirls streaming all the time. Those streams work similarly to any cam site where you tip for kinky content, though you have to be a premium member to even view the streams.
The same goes for the videos and photo galleries. You can find thousands of galleries and sex tapes featuring site-exclusive babes that you won’t find anywhere else. It’s easy to sort through profiles and find a girl or couple to start chatting with. And this site prides itself in not having bots, so you’re more likely to find an actual babe to talk to on this site instead of thousands of fake bots cluttering up the catalog.
Chat, Watch Videos, Fap to Galleries, and Much More All in One Place
You can sort profiles by age, zip code, and gender. It’s easy to scroll through long lists of horny babes in your area without getting scammed by fake profiles or sluts that just want you to subscribe to their OnlyFans or whatever. Each profile preview will have a featured image, age, location, and a checkmark if they are verified as a genuine person. Simply click on a profile to view more details/photos, or you can be coy and leave a like and see if they message you instead. Of course, you can always shoot a hottie a message if you want to skip the bullshit and get right down to business.
Solid Mobile Experience
As I expected from a site that’s been around the block for this long, the mobile site kicks ass. It’s got a great user experience, and you don’t have to worry about any poor formatting. It’s got the same design as the desktop site, with all excess menus tucked away behind handy drop-down menus. I didn’t have any trouble browsing the site, logging in, or checking out profiles. I could continue my chats on the go without any hiccups or roadblocks. Plus, there’s plenty of fap-worthy material worth bringing along with you.
ThePornDude’s Favorite Features
This is one of the better hook-up sites out there. You don’t have to fill out a ton of questions or deal with annoying broads looking for “love” or whatever. Even popular sites like Tinder can be full of girls who just don’t seem to get the fucking point of the app. Here, you’ll find most sluts have pictures featuring their massive milkers, asses, and pussies. So, these babes know what this site is about. And it’s pretty affordable as far as adult-focused fucking sites go. You usually have to pay out an arm and a leg. Here you can get complete access for less than a latte every month. That’s not too bad if you ask me.
What makes all of that shit even better is that the site is easy to browse and has loads of content aside from chat rooms and profiles. You can jerk your dick to amateur photo galleries, videos, and even hot live streams that you won’t find anywhere else. That alone makes the premium price worth it! It’s not very often that you see premium live chats on hook-up sites, so I’m sure you betas will love that shit.
The site has a lot going on. I think they could cut down on the clutter and make it a bit more accessible. It can be a little confusing to navigate if you’re not used to these sorts of sites. Also, let free users get a taste. Cap the chats at a couple of messages a day just so that these fucks can see that these babes are real and eager for some dick. I’m telling you, it’ll bring a lot more paying customers in. And let free users view maybe one or two galleries or videos a day. They’ll get a taste for the action and come back with their wallets ready.
ThePornDude’s Final Thoughts
Overall, Uberhorny.com is worth the visit if you’re looking for an easy hook-up
. Hell, this site even guarantees that you’ll get some action in 3-months or get your money back! What have you betas got to lose? I highly recommend all of you lonely fucks check this one out right now.