Full body sex massages from exotic Asian and local girls with a happy ending? Tell me more, PornDude!
I guess you're looking for a handjob, but you're too lazy to jack yourself off and you want someone else to wank your dick? I got you, bro! Let me introduce you to these sensuous places near you, where your sexual fantasy meets reality and where you can find a "rub & tug" happy end. It is not your regular list of local "sensual" massage parlors in your area, where you can send your girlfriend to get rid of her cellulite. Generally, these relaxing places are not at all for women, but things can happen regarding male masseurs and vaginal techniques.
Hey, we don't want some lesbian feminists to start bitching about equal female rights, so yes, kinky ladies in heat that are looking for a dude to play with their vulva are welcome here too! Which politician actually allowed these bitches out of the kitchen? Hillary Clinton? It certainly ain't Donald Trump that encouraged emancipation! He would make America great again! The Trumpinator would grab them by the pussy, show their place and say "Where's my sandwich?"!
What kind of XXX massages can I choose?
To be more precise, in this category on my porn list, you will have websites that will give you maps and addresses to reach the most exquisite parlors, including saunas and jacuzzis. And when I say exquisite, I am elegant. The correct term would be erotic massage parlors with a happy ending. Some of these adult places even offer full sex massages, if you know what I mean?
I'm a big fan of tantra and slippery Nuru massages myself. I love how they rub their naked soapy tits against my chest (body to body massages), while their big titties are all covered in hot oil and titty fuck my hard dick finishing with a squeezing handjob, until cumshot! I also recommend trying out a footjob. Vietnamese, Filipina and Thai ladies are experts, when it comes to rubbing your dick with their feet, until orgasm!
Or what about a Japanese sakura or prostate massage? Ever let a chick stick a finger in your anus for sexual stimulation, after a shower? Anyways, make sure to check out the AAMPMaps directory, if you're a fan of Asian massage girls that do "the job" in their own apartment. It's like "the girl next door" experience! Be prepared to hear a lot of "Me so horny, me sucky sucky, me love you long time, mister!", while they play with your genitals.
(A typical happy ending handjob!)
What kind of "exotic" masseuses can I expect?
You will have multiple search options and you will be able to take a look at your (spa) masseuses online, including reviews of their previous clients to see if they fit your taste and needs. They look like porn actresses and most of them are real Asian babes with big tits, probably from Thailand, China or South Korea. Or North Korea, who knows, maybe they're cock deprived? Then again, why would these Korean women jump fences and risk their lives, when they have supreme leader Kim Jong Un, who was voted as the sexiest man alive in the world?
Anyways, you're able to find detailed information about the parlors (state/city/area/distance) and girls! Example: name, ethnicity (Arab/Asian/Latina/Indian/ebony/black/caucasian girls), age, weight, height, hair color, hair length, breast cup, breast implants, price/fees/rates, incall/outcall, hairy/shaved kitty and a short "about me" intro. You can also find out what sexual acts they allow like a blowjob (with/without condom), rimjob, kissing, anal, multiple pops, type of massage (clothed/topless/nude/body to body/earthquake), cum in mouth (CIM), (tantric) handjob, squirt and pussy/breast/ass play. You can contact them if you have any other special requests that are not listed on their profile.
Fuck, whenever I pay a visit to one of these salons and I see all these hot chink bitches, I think about that legendary hooker scene in the movie "Full Metal Jacket". I'm lying there butt naked, put on the classic "Nancy Sinatra - These Boots Are Made for Walkin" song on my iPod and I get ready for my tugjob. Just like in that flick, I fantasize about asking these Oriental babes what I get for $10 and in my imagination, I expect them to say "Anything you want"! Sadly enough, the times have changed, since 1987 and if you even dare to say "hi" to a chick these days, you probably end up on the sex offenders' list thanks to that #MeToo bullshit.
(The epic hooker scene in the Hollywood movie “Full Metal Jacket”!)
Luckily enough, Eastern women still know their place in the kitchen and will still do anything to fully sexually satisfy a man. Sure, the razor may not have been invented in that part of the world yet, but you're not forced to eat their hairy slit anyway. Also, don't you love it how they moan like a damn chicken on a farm when you fuck the shit out of them? It kind of sounds like "Oh, shrimp fried rice. Oh, chicken wings!". I always feel like paying a visit to the local KFC fast food restaurant, after I'm done. Hey, it's better than fucking the average naughty American slut, who's probably checking out her Facebook page on her cell phone in the meantime and keeps repeating "Are you done yet?" every 30 seconds.
PornDude, my dick is about to explode! Just give me your conclusion, so I can get to business!
Don't get your hopes up, because pornstar Asa Akira is not there to have sex with you. She is probably making Wicked Pictures rich at this moment. Still, if your mother-in-law has planned a visit and you want to be happy when she comes, get yourself a damn full-service erotic massage with orgasmic tugjob.
Also, for you Russians, Europeans or whatever looking for a sexual massage, I'm going to have to disappoint you. If you're not living in the USA, the current sites are probably pretty useless for you, since all the parlors are located in American states and cities. Then again, this may convince you horndogs to go there on a sex vacation! Oh and please respect their privacy and don't capture videos of the sensual act with a hidden camera in the room!